How Firefly Changed My Life; a tribute to a TV show
November 11th, 2007 Posted in Articles and EssaysWelcome to an at least partially obsessed fan’s tribute to a cancelled TV show, one man who doesn’t exist, and another guy she’s never met. It’s cheesy as hell and I pray to my dear and fluffy lord that nobody I know reads it, so posting it online should be taken as clear evidence that my brain is thinking, and I might want to see to that.
I’ve been beat up, held at gunpoint, and been told more than once that I shouldn’t be alive today. Those are the things in life that are supposed to be traumatic, but what got to me was emotional pain. A friend whom I had been loyal to betrayed me. I was demoted, got my crew taken away on a false accusation of lying. I finally met a wonderful man whom I grew to trust with my heart, only to find out too late that he didn’t share my feelings. And that’s where Firefly found my broken little self, holding the world and all the people in it at arm’s length.
Captain Malcolm Reynolds had much to be bitter about, having suffered just about every hurt and injustice it’s possible to subject a man to. He lost a bitterly fought war, watched his men die on the battlefield, and lost his faith in God. He’d been betrayed, tortured, and hunted. Unlike your typical Hollywood action hero, he was affected and hurt by the events in his life.
And so it was that in Mal, I found my first and only true role model. He could have been forgiven for becoming entirely bitter and unwilling to trust or enjoy the company of other people, or for giving up on life completely. Instead, Mal pulled together a family he trusted, loved, and protected. That takes true strength and courage on a level one rarely sees in fiction or real life. He could on occasion be harsh, but what always showed under the surface was that no matter what, his concern and loyalty to his crew always dictated his actions. His example healed my broken heart and my battered soul.
My love for Firefly and for Mal’s character leads to a deep appreciation for the man playing my new hero: Nathan Fillion. Watching him doesn’t feel like watching an actor play a part; it feels like watching a real person I care deeply about. He has the ability, not just to portray something, but to get you to feel it right along with him. When he’s happy, you’re happy. When he’s hurting, you’re hurting. When he’s amused, you’re amused. He has the ability to portray everything from genuine warmth and affection to the depths of pain and despair, not to mention his utterly hilarious comedic talent.
Joss Whedon deserves enormous praise for writing a brilliantly funny and moving show, but Firefly would not have been what it was without Nathan. Not that I know the man in the slightest, but by all accounts he seems like a genuinely nice person (as do all of the wonderful actors and actresses that made Firefly special). I would be truly honored to meet Nathan one of these days, and even more so to get to know him a little. And in the meantime, I’ll be in my bunk. I doubt that’ll ever happen, but it’s a nice feeling to know that the actor who plays my favorite character of all time is someone I can also care about as a person. I’ll be watching from the sidelines, cheering him on in his career, and saying a little prayer here and there for him.
What more could one ask from Firefly? The fact that this beloved little gem was given the chance to go from “failed TV show” to a major motion picture is beyond inspirational, beyond heartwarming. The fact that the creator, the cast, and the fans loved this show so much had all the makings of one of those bittersweet “life’s not fair” stories. The fact that against all odds, there is a movie written and directed by Joss Whedon starring every single one of our Big Damn Heroes playing in my local theater right now is the finest tribute to miracles, love, and perseverance I’ve seen in a good long while.
So to everyone who was involved in bringing us Firefly and Serenity, congratulations, thank you, and my sincerest best wishes.